It is boring I know, stating the same things over and over again. People go in for variety, and novelty. That is where our aesthetic sense comes in. And that is the starting point of all art. Art is the interpretation of reality as we perceive it. We wake up in the mornings, see the same bed-stead, see the same night lamps, see the same bedside table, see the same walls, the same bed sheets the same curtains, the same flower pots. The window gives us the same trees, the same compound-walls, the same roads the same grainy gravel or cement paths……
We are in despair, the whole humdrummity of life hits us on the head like an umpteen ton hammer. No, we don’t swoon; if we do, that would be an artistic reaction on our parts. But instead we sigh, and get out of the bed, squeeze the same old tube of paste on to the same slightly frayed brush and puts it inside the same old mouth and brushes the same old teeth. We taste the same old mixture of saliva mixed with sweet clay.
We look at the same poor mug seen in the mirror; it had some beauty in the night, in the faded light, now it looks like a baked potato with its skin hanging, in the morning glare. We are not feeling confident, we get inside the toilet and try not to think of what goes on in there.
No one can be blamed for it. I am often like that too. I look in the mirror; I see the same face every day. I get bored, so I lengthen the side burns or wear a beard or shave everything off. Sometimes I shorten my hair or grow it long, I turn my moustache up or down, I wear a Bulganin or a French beard. I put on glasses, different types, different shades, different designs, in the hopes all that would alter the boring thing that I see in the mirror.
Even these are creative efforts aimed at producing a different kind of reality than we do normally see. We do that by manipulating things that we have a right on. We can’t alter the public road, or the skies or the sun, so we have to be satisfied with the small things we can lay our hands on. We even try to alter the lives of the people we meet out of this sheer vacuity. I would not call it viciousness. We are out to create something new and we are so sure that we have a right to do it. We have knowledge haven’t we? We have even friends to supply material to bolster up our puny ego. Although we have little inkling what goes on in our own lives. If anyone asks us what neuron is functioning at any given moment we would either take recourse behind laughter or rage….
We are lost souls, the sooner we realize it the better. We can’t alter any ones lives without altering something in ourselves. If we are really within ourselves we would naturally effect a change in others even otherwise, even without doing anything. Sometimes we would shock them right into their being by our mere presence, or the mere fact that we exist. It is a jolt that is life changing. But some would even then cling to their old lives and try to fake their older selves.
I am sorry to say this, but we are wrong, once we come into contact with something real, we alter even without knowing ourselves. There are forces at work which makes it happen. I watch these forces in operation all the time. I need not react to them, I can even ignore them, but I like this play, this strange display of self importance in things. I would like to always play along. I am the sportive guy.
Life is still a game which makes me laugh, well I would have liked to laugh with everyone of you but unfortunately some of us laugh without mirth, without real pleasure, when some of us die we would cling to earth, frantically thinking about our wives, husbands, children, houses, jewelry, positions in life, friends, bank balances, and art and cart….
Well hopefully when I die, I would dissolve into elements and be no more be anywhere in the individual sense. And my poor sense of humor calls it liberation. Anyway, if any of you know of anything else about my evolution I would be delighted to hear it.
May be there are souls out there who can correct me in this ‘mistaken’ assumption. If so they are welcome here to predict my path. You see I love this dual nonsense called life. I would be the very devil if I can continue this farce. Would some kind souls come and predict that I would be Satan or at least some minor devil in after life. Come on; be kind to a person who has been trying to tell you what he knows about reality.
Or at least can’t you say that I am a great soul, godlike or even god. It would be a great boost to my ego. I would turn my collar up and would prance about. Okay don’t even go to that length, there is no need to be nice about it. So don’t mince words, say that I would become anything, any mean thing. Yet my poor doubt is that everything has to pass through every other existing state as this farce unfolds. The god would pass through different states to become the devil and the devil would become god. I know that this is a destructive statement and would make some of you shiver to your very core. But unfortunately this is the truth. Any child would see it.
The only way to get out of this tangle is to go beyond the duality altogether. But I am willing to listen to other options to reach that state.
They say in the ancient texts that I was alone once and I became manifold out of boredom or out of this creative urge in me.(You can take a joke I hope. It’s not really a joke in essence, but its better keep it at that level now)
Idam eka Evaagra aaseel (This one was all alone)
Naanyath kinchanamishat (There was nothing else to be seen)
Thadekshata (this one mused)
Bahusyam prajaayEti (I shall become many)
My friends that is how I became the world….. I would go back to the earlier state the moment I attract all this back into me. Do you think I am raving? This I AM is not a thing you know about then. You need to try harder.
Okay I will play this game of duality with you. Tell me of someone who has gone beyond the Buddha and I will follow you and won’t stop following you, tell me about a god who won’t become a devil as time passes and I would become a convert to that faith. I am delighted with illumined souls who can amass virtue alone on one side and oust all evil from the world. Prove that it can be done and that the world is non-dual, and I will be your slave from then onwards. Prove it with convincing arguments.
If you can’t, well here is what you do.
KEEP YOUR MIND AT THE PLACE BETWEEN THE EYE BROWS.
Keep at it, keep at it, keep at it.